The biggest battle of Endometriosis for me is weigh loss. I have battled to gain weight for many years especially over the past 2-3 years where my Endo has become more aggressive.
I have fluctuated between a clothing size 6-8 for the past 3-4 years, any time I am stressed I would completely lose my appetite.
Whilst battling Endometriosis my main focus is to ensure I eat because I know how unwell it will make me. I would hide food to pretend I had eaten from quite a young age and I believe Endo is part of the reason I have a eating disorder and I also believe this is something that never leaves you however I have learnt to eat better.
I would always hate the feeling of being full, I would hide food down my underwear when I was younger, sneak to the toilet and flush it away because it would hurt too much when I ate a reasonable amount to feel full.
I was caught doing this many of times by family members but i didn’t understand why I couldn’t bare the feeling of being full.
It’s not normal to avoid feeling full and i strongly feel that if I was diagnosed sooner with Endometriosis I believe I would be in a better position than what I am in now.
During my last surgery I weighed just over 9 stone which is the best I’ve weighed in a long time, however after just 10 days into my treatment after my two operations i lost so much weight I dropped down to just under 7 stone.
I was unable to eat or even drink and keep anything down, I couldn’t stand by myself and when I did I had to have the help of my family and friends to help me upright where I was so unsteady.
I went through a stage of about two to three weeks after my most recent operation were I felt a constant starvation feeling to the point where I never felt full and could eat absolutely everything.
My mum would make me a meal and unlike me I would finish the plate then feel starving for more, I obsessed over random foods that I craved which I never ate before.
I ate 12 cheese strings in one day for three days straight, 38 cheese strings in total within three days along with three meals per day and snacks. For me I have never had a big appetite so this was completely out of character.
Whilst eating like this I had food intolerances which were making me sick and uncomfortable but I just could not stop eating it was extremely alarming.
I went to see my GP who gave me medication to help. Since then I have had another flare up which again my appetite has now gone.
Every day now i am battling this feeling of fullness 24/7. Deciding where to eat and what to eat is a real task because I generally do not feel hungry.
Endometriosis is a disease that not only affect me physically but also mentally. I have to remind myself to eat throughout my day, luckily my friends and family are constantly checking up and asking if I’ve ate and reminding me to eat.
Some months ago i’d know I hadn’t ate well throughout the day so i would binge on foods like chocolate make to me feel like I had eaten.
It’s always a random choice that I will obsess over because I feel it’s a fix of food however I know it’s not healthy but when I’m stressed it’s a easy go to food.
Now I have another operation due to come within the next few weeks I’ve been eating a lot better, that’s not because I’m hungry and feel the want to eat but because Im being reminded to eat and I know I need to eat and I need to be strong within myself to go through this next surgery and recover faster and better.
When battling this disease Endometriosis eating is crucial and so important, the feeling of having to force feed yourself on a daily basis really is a struggle.
I have spoken with many other women who are also suffering with Endometriosis and can relate to this feeling of fullness constantly, but I cannot stress enough just how important it is to eat.
I discovered just how important it is to eat when I got through my most recent surgery and I knew if I had managed to eat more and better then I knew I would have fought it better however the flare ups from Endometriosis caused me not to.
For now I am still recovering from surgery as I’m still swollen and numb in some areas as well as still experiencing pain which I take regular strong pain relief for.
My main focus now is to try and keep myself stress free somehow and keep my weight on ready for my next operation to feel confident in myself to get through it.
I hope by me sharing my journey will help others who can also relate to this. I have cut all gluten, dairy and caffeine from my diet strictly and have been eating healthy and as regularly as I can.
Please get in contact if you have any tips on building an appetite as I have tried everything.
My contact details are on my page within the contact blog.
Thank you for taking your time in reading my blog, I hope you have gained some understanding of the importance of keeping weight on and what I have been having to face on a daily basis battling Endometriosis disease.
Please share my blogs to help raise awareness and maybe one day a cure can be found to help myself and other women who are suffering.