How is it possible to feel right as rain one minute to down in the dumps the next? One moment you feel yourself, feel high on life and enjoy time with your family, your spouse and your friends then the next your curled up in a ball cradling a Endo belly waiting for your intake of codein to kick in whilst holding a hot water bottle to your back and trying your best to hold down the feeling of being sick.
When battling a chronic disease that isn’t always visual to others on the outside doesn’t mean your not fighting a forever battle. I can’t remeber the last time I went to sleep without having to take codein and anti sickness tablets, making sure my windows open because I’m so hot where I feel I want to be sick but I can’t.
That every day feeling of being drowsy and a constantly feeling like I’m stoned. Some days I can barely string a sentence together but those days I keep myself tucked up in bed in front of the tv snuggling Winston 🐶 (my dog)
My eyes are dark and bruised but I’ve learnt make up skills that help cover up dark circles. My skin breaks out because of the hormonal imbalance Endo gives off, my periods are now a week apart and my face a lot of the time is gaunt where my weight fluctuates so much.
People are quick to judge and quick to forget but the feeling of having this chronic disease never leaves you which is why it’s important to remind other Endo sufferers they are not alone.
When I enjoy myself I make an effort in my appearance and make the most of what I do because I don’t know when my next flare up will be.
I wanted to share some tips to hopefully help other women who like me care about their appearance and hopefully you can also share your tips with me too.
I only actually wear make up two days a week, Sometimes three if I’m having a good week. My hair is usually up in a bun on the top of my head where I just don’t have the energy and care to do it.
A friend of mine Frankie bought me the L.A.Girl Pro Conseal consealer set (£6.99 for the set off amazon) they are red, green and cream coloured liquids that at the time I had no idea what to do with them.
Since playing around with these products I have learnt that the red is for under eyes, I also use it for my smile lines, this for me fills the crease and takes away the darkness under my eyes.
I use a primer to start with ( my favourite is W7 Camera Ready, £5.99 off amazon ) . I start with the red under eyes ( not too much) I blend it with a brush and look absolutely rediculous until I then use the cream as a consealer, the green I use on red blotchy areas.
I have a different brush for each concealer to blend each colour, once I’ve blended them I then use a foundation all over.
My face no longer looks as though I’ve had broken sleep, some nights I manage 3-4 hours sleep whilst eating a minimal amount and spending my days attending physio, blood tests and GP appointments.
I take multi vitamins daily which make me feel better, I’m not sure if they even work however I feel better knowing that I’ve taken them.
My hair was brittle and felt lifeless so just recently I treated myself to hair extensions by BlowOutBeauty by Holly in Thorpe Bay, I honesty feel so much better now my locks are long heathy and shiny and I couldn’t recommend Holly enough, not only does she come to me to wash and blow dry it weekly she even comes to me for maintenance because I’m not always well enough to travel.
Knowing how it feels to be constantly in and out of hospital, never knowing whether your going to flare up so fierce you’ll need surgery I have obsessed over wearing stick on nails. Primark stick on nails are amazing and just £1.
I use The Edge nail glue ( Ebay £4 ) and they stay on for up to 2-3 weeks at a time. However I actually had mine down by the salon last week as a treat because I have a few weeks now until my next surgery but il be back to using the stick on nails again real soon.
Being a beautician and hair extensionist I love all things girly and there’s nothing that makes me feel better than dolling myself up and going to nice places with great company.
One thing suffering with Endometriosis has taught me is to live every day like it’s your last and smile as much as you can. I’m lucky I’m a positive person as I can’t imagine where I would be and how I would feel if I didn’t have the reasureance and positivity my friends and family give me.
Just recently my under eyes are looking worse and worse, my Endo is flaring up just like It did last May and then again last December, I’m due surgery again any time soon ( appointments start in June ) and I feel constantly sluggish.
I’ve been considering having filler under my eyes for a while but I just don’t know whether to try it. I hate looking in the mirror and seeing myself look unwell and I feel I want to do something about it, has anyone else tried this? Is it painful and does it work?
I refuse to allow this disease to ruin my life as well as shatter me as a person. Endometriosis may we’ll be taking over my body on the inside but I refuse to allow it to break me. I haven’t been able to go back to work for almost a year now, being a sociable busy person I am bored and itching to do something.
I completed a acrylic nail course June last year before I fell ill and had my first operation for Endo so I never got a chance to carry it on as by the time I recovered I was back having a second surgery followed by a third. I’ve recently bought all the tools and accessories to practise nail designs to keep me busy in my days whilst I’m unable to do much else.
There’s nothing I can do to stop Endometriosis other than obey by the rules, no gluten, no dairy, no wheat, no caffeine, no alcohol, no exercise and enhance whatever I can to make me feel better and help make my days easier.
The medication I am taking on a daily basis affects my daily moods and tasks, sometimes I will sit for hours and not even realise the time going by, other days il go out and have a perfect day with the perfect company then come the evening I’m not myself at all.
Endometriosis is a life ruining disease, being in the severe stage of Endometriosis with Frozen Pelvis Disease awaiting my fourth surgery in just under ten monts is absolutely draining.
I will continue to write my blogs to raise awareness, share my journey and reach out to other women.
You are not alone .